BECOMING FERTILE | 3/3/22

I quit birth control when I moved to SF in 2014 - it had been making me crazy depressed before my period and something about San Francisco’s free love hippie vibes made me want to live without the hormones.

I stoped taking it and slowly returned to my natural self (I had been on it for 7 years, since I was 16.)

While I’d love to tell you that I practiced great safer sex practices, I mostly did the withdrawal method - pull & pray, baby! (Which can be as effective as condoms when done mindfully.)

And, with what doctors would define as “high-risk behavior,” I never got pregnant. I took plan B only twice, when condoms broke, until realizing I was allergic to the intense pill.

The whole time in lived in SF (5 years,) I never had a pregnancy scare. How could that be? I wasn’t exactly being careful. I worried I was infertile.

And honestly, I believe I was. I shared in previous posts how much I was overworking. My mental state was out of balance. I was having chronic pain and experiencing inflammation. There were lots of toxic people in my life.

My body was not a safe home for a baby, for new life.

After many detoxes and spiritual workshops and journal prompts and meditation journeys, something changed.

Last summer, for the first time, I felt it. I felt that I could get pregnant. I felt my fertility.

It wasn’t the right time (or the right man) so I told my spirit baby to wait. Not right now, please.

But I felt it. It was possible. It is possible.

My healing work had an unexpected upside - I was becoming fertile.